


Up

by brokencasbutt67



Category: Good Omens (TV), Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett
Genre: Angst, Baptism, Crowley (Good Omens) Sings, Crowley (Good Omens) has a Vulva, Cuddling & Snuggling, Drunk Crowley (Good Omens), Eventual Smut, Female Crowley (Good Omens), First Kiss, Holding Hands, Insecure Aziraphale, Insecure Crowley (Good Omens), Insecurities, Kissing, Light Angst, M/M, Marriage Proposal, Murder, Other, Revenge, Scared Crowley (Good Omens), Sharing a Bed, Singing, Sleepy Cuddles, Smut, Song Lyrics
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-04
Updated: 2019-07-24
Packaged: 2020-06-09 14:04:17
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 8,172
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19477420
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/brokencasbutt67/pseuds/brokencasbutt67
Summary: This references:The script for episode 6 - sourced here: https://www.springfieldspringfield.co.uk/view_episode_scripts.php?tv-show=good-omens-2019&episode=s01e06 - I also own none of this.Shinedown's GET UP and Through The Ghost lyrics (italicised) - They hold copyright and all that fun stuff, I merely borrowed the lyricsSMUT COMES IN LATER CHAPTERS.





	1. Chapter 1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Had to change the chapter :) - apparently despite making it clear that i don't own the lyrics or gomens, it's not good enough

They are fucked. _Fucked._

“Come up with something or… or I’ll never talk to you again” The words hit Crowley’s ears before they fully had left Aziraphale’s mouth. He felt something that resembled a heart breaking in two, though he couldn’t be entirely sure. Looking around, it took a moment but he got an idea of what to do. It wouldn’t resolve the situation, but it would give them a few more minutes to come up with a plan.

Crowley took a deep breath when he managed to get Aziraphale, himself and Adam Young away from the air force base for long enough to get a breath in, and construct an idea. He looked over to Aziraphale.  
“Better?” He snarked, panting, though he wasn’t angry, merely trying to mend his almost broken heart.  
“Much actually” Aziraphale smiled, while still ‘wielding’ that stupid flaming sword.  
  
“Who up top has said something to you? What did they say?” Crowley asked, after taking Aziraphale’s hand and dragging him a few meters away from Adam, he _couldn’t_ hear this conversation.  
“Excuse me?” Aziraphale asked, looking to Crowley with confusion.  
“Which ‘holier than thou’ being said something to you? You’ve been different since…well since the fire, could be that I guess … ” Crowley stated, trailing off.  
“Oh, I believe that could be because the quartermaster said I was a ‘pathetic excuse for an angel…’, though he could very well be correct I suppose. I don’t want to fight in any war, I discorporated, I cursed, I gave away my - we don’t have time for this!” Aziraphale exclaimed, trying to turn the topic of conversation off of himself.  
“The boy…” He added, while moving back to Adam, who was watching the entire encounter with an amused expression on his face. _Suppose it isn’t a common occurrence for an 11 year old to see an angel open up some of their insecurities to a demon._

  
“The boy can wait a damn minute” Crowley responded, pushing Aziraphale back in front of him.  
“You listen to me, angel, and you listen good” Crowley said, lightly prodding Aziraphale’s chest.  
“ _Listen good?_ I think you mean listen _well_ ” Aziraphale stated.  
“Not important, angel, listen to what I’m about to say” Crowley said.  
“You are one of the most powerful beings in existence. _Don’t sell yourself short, you might be bulletproof. It’s hard to move mountains when you’re paralysed, but you gotta try_ ” Crowley spoke softly, only the angel could hear him. Aziraphale let the words wash over him, trying to forget how the quartermaster had made him feel. Even as a powerful angel, it hurt.   
“Crowley…I…” Aziraphale started, but before he could finish, he met the demon’s gold eyes. Making eye contact seemed to trigger something in the demon and Crowley had fisted his hands into Aziraphale’s jacket, pulling the angel close. The close proximity meant that Crowley could see the moment Aziraphale’s cheeks flushed pink and his eyes darkened with… _lust?_

“This may be our last day together once the big guys find out…I need to do this” Crowley murmured, his eyes dropping to Aziraphale’s lips, and then back up to the angel’s eyes. Before Aziraphale could ask _what do you mean?_ Crowley had pressed his lips against Aziraphale’s, while pulling the angel impossibly close. Before the kiss could deepen, or go anywhere, the pair were separated by Adam, coughing uncomfortably a few meters away. _Suppose it’s not every day you see a demon kiss an angel._

* * *

Turning to Adam, Aziraphale shot him a warm smile, though he didn’t know what to say.  
“Adam, listen, your real father is coming to destroy you” Crowley started speaking, dragging Aziraphale along with him, keeping a firm grip of the angel’s hand. Aziraphale rolled his eyes. 

_They’re meant to be encouraging the kid, not scare him to death._   
“My dad? He wouldn’t hurt a fly” Adam spoke, voice filled with confusion.  
“Not your earthly father, Satan” Crowley explained.  
“He's coming and he's angry” He finished.  
“So what do you want me to do about it? Fight him?” Adam asked, sounding as though he was on the verge of tears. Aziraphale felt his heart breaking for the boy, his life had been turned upside down at such a young age. Before Aziraphale could respond, Crowley intervened.  
  
“I don’t think fighting him would do any good. We’re going to have to come up with something else” Crowley said, looking to Aziraphale, who could only shrug in response.  
“But I’m just a kid!” Adam cried.  
“But that’s not a bad thing to be, Adam. You know, I was scared that you’d be Hell incarnate, I hoped, prayed even, that you’d be Heaven incarnate. But you’re neither of those things, you’re much better. You’re human incarnate” Aziraphale said, sincerely, his eyes meeting Crowley’s through the dark sunglasses that the demon always wore.  
“Adam, reality will listen to you right now. You can change things” Crowley said, taking Adam’s hand in his own.  
“And whatever happens, for good or for evil, we’re beside you” Aziraphale said, while taking Adam’s other hand in his own. 

* * *

“I’m going to start time. You won’t have long to do whatever it is that you’re going to do” Crowley said, while putting them back to normal time.  
“So do it quickly” Crowley grunted. Adam nodded, though it could be mistaken with him shaking with fear.

Adam’s eyes widened when he felt the ground rumbling, followed by a creature emerging from the depths. _So that’s Satan._

“Where is my son? You? You're my rebellious brat of a son? Come here, now” The deep voice filled the air. Adam shakily took steps forward, while Crowley grabbed Aziraphale’s hand, clenching it impossibly tightly in his own. It was clear that Crowley was petrified. Aziraphale felt his heart, well not his heart, _the heart_ pounding in his chest as Adam stood tall against Satan. When Crowley’s hand slid into his own, he looked down to where they were connected, suppressing his smile. _Now isn’t the time for a forbidden romance._

“You’re not my dad” Adam shouted, and it took a moment for Aziraphale to realise what Adam was doing.  
“Dads don't wait until you're 11 to say show up, only to tell you off” Adam continued.  
“What?” Satan looked taken aback as his son let out his teenage angst early. The ground rumbled and groaned as Adam continued with what he was saying, it seemed to be successful.  
“If I’m in trouble with my dad then it won't be you. It's going to be the dad who was there all along. Even if he is geeky and awkward, he was there for me and I love him. You? You're nothing to me, and nothing anyone, just a figment of their imaginations” Adam shouted.  
“What did you say, you little brat?” Satan exclaimed.  
“You can do it. Go on, Adam. Say it again!” Crowley shouted his words of encouragement.  
“Come here!” Satan ordered. 

“You’re not my dad. You never were and you never will be” Adam shouted. Satan began to collapse in front of them, prompting Adam to take a step back. Satan cried out as he burnt away, back through the Earth's crust to the pits of Hell. Through the smoke, a maroon car could be heard spluttering along. Moments later, it appeared, once the smoke had faded.

* * *

“Adam? Adam?!” A man shouted, as he emerged from the car.  
“That’s...not his real father?” Aziraphale said, watching the man making his way towards the group. The father could be overheard speaking as Crowley turned to face him.  
“Oh for Heaven’s sake. Where the devil is he?” Mr Young asked, though Aziraphale wasn’t fully focusing on him, he was focused on Crowley.  
“It is. It is now, and always was. Adam did it” Crowley smiled. A smile covered Aziraphale’s face, Crowley felt a warmth bloom inside of him at the angel’s smile.  
  
After Adam, and everyone else left, Crowley and Aziraphale were alone, again.  
“I suppose I should be going. I need to get back to the London” Aziraphale said softly, shifting to let go of Crowley’s hand, though he was reluctant.  
“You could…maybe, if you want to, go grab some dinner with me before taking the bus?” Crowley offered.  
“That would be nice…” Aziraphale smiled, watching as Crowley took his hand again. 

“Are we going to talk about… what happened?” Aziraphale asked.  
“Do you want to?” Crowley asked, as they began walking towards the village pub.  
“Well…” Aziraphale trailed off. Aziraphale looked over as Crowley reached into his jacket pocket and pulled some sunglasses out after his other pair had become too damaged.  
“I don’t think my side would like it…” He admitted.  
“You don’t have a side anymore. Neither of us do, we are our own side, angel” Crowley said softly.  
“That is very true” Aziraphale responded.  
“You know what, let’s do it” He exclaimed. Crowley smiled, squeezing the warm hand in his cold one. His eyes followed a police car that sped past them, going towards the airbase with it’s sirens blaring and blue lights flashing. Crowley felt Aziraphale’s anxiety peak, though it fell just as quickly.

* * *

While they were having dinner in the pub, most of the village residents were watching them but neither being cared. Crowley was quite content watching Aziraphale eating his food, while the angel sat close to him. 

Soon after they had eaten it was dark out, they were sitting on the bench, waiting for the bus to go back to London.  
“I suppose I better get him to drop me at my bookshop” Aziraphale muttered, while looking up to the moon for a brief moment before looking at the damp road in front of him again. Crowley was still holding his hand, still as tightly as when they had Satan in front of them.  
“The fire... remember?” Crowley murmured. 

“You can stay at my place, if you like” He offered, looking to the angel.  
“That would be nice, thank you” Aziraphale responded, watching as Crowley put his free hand out for the bus.

Crowley’s apartment was minimal, Aziraphale learnt that when he offered to sleep on the sofa. Crowley’s response that there wasn’t one seemed to contradict everything that Crowley was, a being of indulgence. Crowley slithered into bed, leaving his clothes resting over the back of a chair. Aziraphale awkwardly undressed, folding his clothes up and resting them by his shoes. He climbed into the bed, biting his lip. He didn’t know what to say. Crowley curled close to Aziraphale, resting his head on the angel’s chest. Aziraphale smiled and looked down to the demon cuddling close to him. 

* * *

3am rolled around and Crowley was awake. He was worrying about the implications of what they had done, what they would do and what they were currently doing. Looking down, he smiled when he saw Aziraphale’s ruffled hair. The angel mumbled in his sleep as he snuggled closer to the demon.

"Will you hide yourself away, Are you living through a ghost?  
Did you finally find that place, above the shadows,

Where the world can never know you like I do ” Crowley sung, voice barely a whisper, curling close to Aziraphale as he tried to go back to sleep, to cherish the time that they have together.

Giving up isn’t an option.

 _It never was_. 


	2. Chapter 2

Laid in bed, Crowley looked down and stroked his fingers through Aziraphale’s wild hair. The angel, despite claiming that sleep was useless, was sleeping peacefully on the demon’s chest, and he had been for several hours now. Crowley had slept for a while, but the demon’s in the back of his head had made themselves known for a millionth time and Crowley couldn’t keep them quiet anymore. Hastur was the first one to cause these issues.  _ The angel won’t love you. Won’t even like you, you’re a demon. Demons and angels don’t mix. They never should. _

Crowley would always respond to Hastur and Ligur that he didn’t want to be a demon, that he just asked too many questions in the wrong places. But it never changed, the thoughts stayed in his head.  It was like Hastur and Ligur had set up a new home in the back of his head. _Maybe they had_.   
  
“Crowley” Aziraphale murmured, rolling over. He sleepily lifted his head and rested his elbows at the sides of Crowley’s chest, holding his head up.  In this position, Crowley was very aware that the angel's head was mere centimeters from Crowley's boxer shorts. That wasn't important though, Crowley was massaging his fingers through Aziraphale's hair.   
“Angel” Crowley responded, massaging the angel’s hair gently.    
“What’s going on in that pretty head?” Crowley asked, seeing concern in Aziraphale’s eyes.    
“You were talking to yourself. You only talk to yourself when something has scared or upset you, you did it the night after the fire here” Aziraphale responded, reaching up to cup the demon’s cheek when he saw fear building in his eyes. Crowley’s eyes darted from side to side, avoiding the caring depths of Aziraphale’s eyes.    


“What was it?” Aziraphale asked, brushing his thumb over the demon’s cheek. He felt the demon tense when his thumb brushed over the thin skin beneath his eyes, where scales that showed Crowley’s true form were most prominent.    
“Hastur… Ligur…” Crowley whispered, his eyes darting around.  He couldn't meet Aziraphale's eyes, he knew it would lead to a meltdown that he didn't have the energy for.   
“What did they do?” Aziraphale asked, moving to sit up, while Crowley sat up. They were sat cross legged, facing each other. Crowley’s hands rested in his lap, though Aziraphale lifted his right hand and massaged it gently. Crowley sighed.    
“Do we have to have this conversation?” Crowley asked.   
“Yes, my dear. This problem won’t resolve itself if you do not talk about it” Aziraphale responded. Crowley sighed and reluctantly nodded.    
“They were the first to find out I loved you” The demon admitted, voice almost a whisper. If Aziraphale was anything other than what he was, he would ask Crowley to speak up, something that would only add to the demon’s anxiety and distress. Being an angel, he didn’t need that. He heard every word. Immediately his heart sank. He knew how cruel demons could be at the best of times, but knowing Hastur and Ligur, he knew it would be much worse.    


Words wouldn’t fit to what Aziraphale wanted to tell Crowley. He wanted the demon to know Aziraphale, to trust him, to talk to him.    
“They tried to torture me, to get your wherabouts…” Crowley admitted, a sigh of defeat left his throat.    
“They wanted to hurt you, to hurt me” Crowley’s hand was shaking where Aziraphale was massaging it.    
“Why would they want to hurt you?” Aziraphale asked, moving to massage Crowley’s left hand instead.    
“Fuck knows” Crowley shrugged, not missing the wince from Aziraphale at the curse.   
“Sorry” Crowley muttered.    
  
“What are they saying?” Aziraphale asked, after a few moments of silence.    
“Hu-what?” Crowley responded, clearly having been deep in his thoughts a moment prior.    
“Ligur and Hastur, what is it that they have said?” Aziraphale asked. Crowley sighed again, not wanting to go into the topic of conversation particularly.    
“That you wouldn’t want me, that you’d hurt me, that I’d scare you…” Crowley whispered, looking down.  _ It’s stupid. They’re just words.  _   
  
“My dear, if I didn’t want to be with a demon…If demon’s scared me…” Aziraphale spoke softly, after a few moments of awkward silence. Crowley had been close to getting up and leaving, going to find the bottle of holy water hidden away and chug it like a bottle of Pepsi.    
“Would I do this?” Aziraphale murmured, before shifting up the bed. Cupping Crowley’s cheeks, he kissed the demon deeply, one hand moving to hold the demon’s hip, cuddling close. The kiss was gentle, the cold lips of the demon moved against Aziraphale’s in a soft movement. The kiss was perfect.

“I suppose you are correct” Crowley spoke softly, they’d only separated because the awkward positioning of how they were seated hadn’t helped.    
“Listen to me, my dear, I do not care where you come from, or what you are considered to be. It’s who you are that attracts me” Aziraphale murmured, brushing his fingers through the shorter hair at the nape of Crowley’s neck. Crowley shakily nodded.    
“But surely there’s something? I’m a demon for Heav-Hell’s sake” Crowley said, almost gagging around the word ‘Heaven’.    
“You’re a demon. That doesn’t mean you’re a bad person” Aziraphale responded. Crowley nodded and looked down to where his hands were resting limply in his lap.

After a few moments, a yawn slipped from Crowley’s mouth. Shifting on the bed, Aziraphale was able to move them until they were both spooning again, Crowley’s lithe waste being held between Aziraphale’s arm and his belly. The demon fell asleep to the feeling of Aziraphale’s hand brushing through his hair again, as well as the soft touch of feathers that was protecting them both from the outside world.    
  
While the demon slept soundly, Aziraphale began scheming. He might be an angel but he isn’t holier than thou, especially not when it involves his demon being upset. He wanted revenge against Hastur and Ligur, no one is allowed to make Crowley feel how he has tonight.  _ No one.    
_

Reaching over, Aziraphale opened the drawer beside the bed and reached in. He found the small flask of holy water that he kept by his bed. He began coming up with a plan, and it didn’t take long for him to get one.   


Taking a note of the demons’ fondness for whiskey, Aziraphale had a plan schemed up within less than an hour.    
“Angel, sleep” Crowley muttered, turning into Aziraphale’s chest. He rested his head close to Aziraphale’s pounding heart, his hand resting on Aziraphale’s waist. 


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Smut ahead. If you're under 18, pls leave. I have other Good Omens fics that are age appropriate.

After Crowley’s admittal of his insecurities, Aziraphale had made it his personal mission to show his demon just how much he loved him. One night, the shop had to be open later, someone was stopping by to bring some first editions that Aziraphale  _ must _ have. Crowley had decided that he would go back to his apartment while that was going on, he needed to check on the plants, and scare the living fear out of them again. 

* * *

Laid on his bed, after he’d checked the plants and caught up on his chores, Crowley’s thoughts were getting the best of him again. Instead of wallowing in his pain, he decided to go to the pub close to the bookshop. He’d check in on Aziraphale once he suspected the deal to be done. 

That didn’t happen. Crowley got hammered, trying to drown out the thoughts in the back of his head.    
“Damn you Hastur” Crowley slurred, waving the bottle of vintage red at no one in particular. He’d been at this for hours, so much so that the pub had lost customers while he’d been there, not that he cared.    
“He fuckin’ loves me Ligur, you little shit. I don’t know why either, but he damn well does” Crowley slurred, slamming the bottle onto the table, where it smashed into several pieces.    


Aziraphale was just about to lock up when he saw an associate of his and Crowley’s, who was human.    
“Hey Zira, I think you better get to O’Leary’s” They said, while heading in the opposite direction.    
“Why? Is something going on?” Aziraphale asked, both worried and curious.    
“Your husband has had a bit too much to drink” They responded, being dragged along by their partner.    
“Husband?” Aziraphale asked, voice filled with confusion.    
“Crowley? Sorry, I assumed you guys were married or something”    
“Ah right. Yes, I should get down there. Thank you” Aziraphale said, while locking up. He made his way down the street, his heart pounding. He didn’t want to think too much about the comment about he and Crowley being married. Their relationship was somewhere between friends and lovers, but neither being would bring up the conversation, both for fear of losing the other.    


When Aziraphale got to the pub, he was taken aback at the sight. Crowley was being manhandled out of the building by two burley, balding security guards who looked as though they could snap the demon in half with ease. That scared Aziraphale more than anything ever had, even more than the blood dripping from the demon’s hand. Aziraphale grabbed Crowley, before apologising to the security guards and handing them £50, though he didn’t know if that would be enough to cover whatever damages Crowley had caused.    


* * *

It took them twice as long to get from the pub to the shop than it did for Aziraphale to get there alone. Aziraphale had to use a miracle to open the door, trying to keep a hold of Crowley while trying to unlock a door was a near impossible feat at the best of times, never mind when the demon is drunk beyond what is possible for their beings. 

Walking into the shop, Aziraphale locked up immediately and snapped his fingers, watching the light in the middle of the ceiling turn on. Aziraphale’s eyes landed on the demon, who was currently knocked out on his sofa. Aziraphale sauntered over, his eyes not leaving the demon.    
“Oh Crowley, my dear, what have you gotten yourself into?” Aziraphale murmured, kneeling beside the sofa. He stroked his fingers through the sweat - slicked mop of ginger - brown on the demon’s head, watching as he leant into the angel’s touch.    
“Azzzzir-phil” Crowley slurred, eyes barely staying open.    
“I’m here” Aziraphale promised, cupping Crowley’s bleeding hand and healing it with a miracle that would definitely be noticed by everyone up top. They were already out for Aziraphale’s blood after he and Crowley had stopped Armageddon, healing the demon would only add to the anger from Heaven. But Aziraphale no longer cares. 

It took him a few moments but he was able to maneuver the demon into his arms and lead him through to the bedroom out back, in what had become Aziraphale’s home. Settling the demon onto the bed, Aziraphale grabbed a book and got himself comfortable in the large chair in the corner, waiting for Crowley to reawaken.    


While the demon slept, Aziraphale thought back to his scheme from not that long ago, when Crowley’s insecurities were bad previously. He had the idea almost entirely planned out. Though there was one thing needed to smooth out, though that too was coming to fruition in his head. A groan pulled Aziraphale from his thoughts. Looking over, he felt an indescribable emotion in his heart when he saw the demon asleep. 

_ One more miracle can’t hurt _ . He thought, while changing into his sleep wear and climbing into the bed. He brushed his fingers over Crowley’s head, ensuring the demon was no longer drunk. Climbing under the duvet, Aziraphale curled close to Crowley and allowed himself to fall asleep. 

* * *

Aziraphale awoke first. It was 9:32:14am when he awoke. Rolling over, he stroked his thumb over Crowley’s jaw gently. Reaching up, he mouthed along Crowley’s neck, easing the demon awake. Crowley awoke to Aziraphale lightly biting the skin on his neck. It wasn’t the first time that they’d done this, far from it, but rarely did Aziraphale take charge.    
“Angel?” Crowley asked, voice filled with a mixture of sleep and confusion.    
“Good morning, my dear. How are you feeling today?” Aziraphale responded, looking up to Crowley’s golden eyes.    
“Let’s not go there” Crowley responded, attempting to subtly adjust himself in his boxers.    
“What’s wrong, my dear?” Aziraphale asked, not missing the shaky intake of breath, or the tears welling up in Crowley’s eyes.    
“I - nothing” Crowley sighed, looking up in an attempt to stop the tears.    
“Don’t lie to me, Crowley, I want only what is best for you” Aziraphale responded.    
“That’s just it! No one ever has!” Crowley snapped. His heart sank, he suspected that Aziraphale would leave. He was unnecessarily nasty.    
“Let me show you what you mean to me, my dear, what you  _ do _ to me” Aziraphale whispered, his mouth trailing along Crowley’s neck. The demon shakily nodded, and within the blink of an eye, he was naked. Aziraphale was too.    
“You are beautiful” Aziraphale murmured, trailing his tongue down to Crowley’s nipple. The demon gasped and groaned, writhing on the bed. He briefly became aware that Aziraphale was thrusting his hips against the bed. Crowley bit his lip as he looked down. Despite being in a male - presenting body, there was one thing that he had changed to female. It was much easier for him, but in times like this, he wished he didn’t have it.  _ What a mess, not a dude or girl _ . The voice in the back of his head spoke up again, but before Crowley could even think of a response, he was jolted forward by the angel’s inexperienced tongue circling his clit in all of the right ways.    
“Hol - mmh - motherfucker” Crowley cursed, his hand coming to rest in Aziraphale’s hair. Aziraphale smirked and continued what he was doing for a few moments more before he moved to sit up.   
“You, my dear, are perfect” Aziraphale murmured. A flush covered the demon’s cheeks, he bit his lip. He wanted to hide, to wrap himself in the duvet and hide away forever.    
“Magnificent” Aziraphale murmured, his mouth falling back to Crowley’s neck, while two fingers eased into Crowley’s soaked core.    
“Just look at you…so beautiful” Aziraphale murmured. Crowley moaned, wanton as he tried to speed up the action.  _ To stop Aziraphale talking. _ _   
_   
Despite it not being a necessary task, Aziraphale liked to prepare Crowley when they had sex, regardless of whether his ‘bits’ (as Aziraphale called them) were male or female. Crowley, on the other hand, just wanted him to get on with it.    
“Patience is a virtue, dear boy” Aziraphale murmured, briefly hearing some of Crowley’s thoughts.    
“I - I never - fuck - I never had time for the virtues” Crowley spoke, though moans were slipping through.    
“I believe you are sufficiently prepared” Aziraphale murmured, smirking up to Crowley. A slim leg roped around Aziraphale’s thick waist as he lined himself up. He eased in, going slower than he often did. Crowley knew why, the angel  _ needed _ to show Crowley just what he thought. It was driving the demon insane though. By the time Aziraphale was fully seated, Crowley was tempted to flip them over and ride him into oblivion.  __ Well maybe not oblivion. 

The first thrust was always a shaky one from Aziraphale, but once he began to build a rhythm, it didn’t take long to have Crowley turning into a babbling mess beneath him.    
“Only you… so beautiful, just look at you” Aziraphale muttered, and by magic, their positions were completely switched around. The demon was laid on Aziraphale’s chest, and he could see every movement from the angel in the mirror that covered the ceiling. Crowley tried to look away when he heard the voice in the back of his head again.  _ You’re a demon, he’s an angel. It won’t work _ . But he couldn’t. He was mesmerised by the sight.    


Crowley was so deep in thoughts that his orgasm nearly knocked him off the bed, if not for Aziraphale holding onto his slim hips.    
“Fuuck” The demon groaned, his head falling back against Aziraphale’s shoulder. Aziraphale came almost immediately after, with a muttered ‘fudge cakes’.

After several minutes of the pair calming down, Aziraphale eased out of Crowley, and with a brief thought, they were cleaned up. Crowley curled close to Aziraphale, impossibly closer. He kissed the angel’s neck, barely able to stay awake. Aziraphale smiled and pulled the duvet over them, watching Crowley as he slept. 


	4. Chapter 4

Crowley slept for hours. Aziraphale didn’t. It was a common occurrence, though usually the angel would read, while watching the demon sleep. The angel had an hour of sleep before he decided to start his plan. Walking towards the broom closet, Aziraphale looked to the demon summoning symbol on the floor. Crowley had drawn it a while back, he said that if Aziraphale needed him. He taught him how to summon a demon, something that was easier than expected. _Apparently it only required the name of the demons being said three times._ _   
_

Walking in the closet, Aziraphale grabbed the vintage whiskey that he’d left in there. He miracled another bottle and mixed it with holy water. He left it on the side, very much aware that both Hastur and Ligur would steal it. That’s the plan. He grabbed the non - tainted whiskey and put it aside before summoning the demons. He slid out of the closet just before they arrived, locking the door. He listened through the door as Hastur and Ligur were muttering to themselves, in confusion.    
“Ooh whiskey!” One of them could be heard saying. Aziraphale smiled to himself, hearing two groans a moment later. Opening the door, Aziraphale smirked as he saw the smoking piles.    
“Don’t hurt my demon again, fuckers” He growled, before making his way back to the bedroom. 

* * *

It was weeks before Crowley noticed anything. He was looking for the sweeping brush, not having the energy to snap away the dirt in the kitchen. Opening the closet, he frowned when he saw two piles of ash.    
“Hey, uh Az?” Crowley called out. The aura of white that the angel emitted appeared a moment later.    
“Hello Crowley” He said, not lifting his eyes from the book in his hands.    
“Care to explain something to me?” Crowley asked, not hiding his anger.   
“What on Ear- oh” Aziraphale began speaking before looking up, but when he looked up, he gulped.    
“You better have a bloody good explanation for this Aziraphale” Crowley growled, glaring at the spot. He looked to Aziraphale, biting his lip. The angel had a fear in his eyes, deep seated and damaging. Crowley sighed.  _ He’d caused that fear. He’d promised never to hurt the angel.  _ _   
_ __   
“I’m sorry. I wanted to deal with Hastur and Ligur” Aziraphale admitted, putting the book on the desk behind him. Crowley frowned.    
“What do you mean?” He asked, looking to the angel.    
“I didn’t want them hurting you” Aziraphale admitted, timidly. He had tears rolling down his cheeks, clearly he was scared. Crowley sighed.    
“Aziraphale, they’ll kill us both” Crowley berated him.    
“What they did to me? That doesn’t matter. Killing them is gonna cause chaos” Crowley sighed.    
“You stupid angel! Do you have any idea what you’ve done” Crowley growled and immediately he regretted saying it. The angel had a look of pure fear in his eyes, as though Crowley was a cruel demon, not the kind demon that he was known to be. 

“Forget about it” He muttered, seeing Aziraphale’s heart break when he looked to the floor. Before Crowley could say anything to the angel, he was gone, leaving the demon alone. A door slam alerted him to Aziraphale’s whereabouts,  _ their bedroom _ . 

Walking to the bedroom.    
“Azira…” Crowley said softly, while opening the door. Looking into the room, he saw the angel staring at the wall with a blank expression. It was as though the angel wasn’t fully there, like he was in Heaven. 

The angel had only ever been like this one other time, when the bookshop burned down. Crowley mentally murdered himself. Taking a small step forward, though quickly retracted his leg when it  _ burned _ .   
“Aziraphale, I’m sorry okay” Crowley said.  _ Pathetic attempt at an apology.  _ _   
_ “I don’t want anyone to get you, I care about you too much to see you get hurt by anyone, especially if it’s a demon that hurts you” Crowley said, leaning against the door frame. His voice cracked with emotion as he thought of anyone hurting the angel.  __ I’ve hurt him , the thought hurt Crowley more than if he stepped into the bedroom.   
“Please, angel” Crowley begged. The angel didn’t speak, move and Crowey thought that he didn’t even breathe, though it wasn’t necessary anyway. 

* * *

Crowley sighed.    
“I don’t care if it kills me, I’m coming in” He said, making his way into the room. His skin burned as he took each step. He couldn’t think, see or feel anything. He was able to grab the bedpost and drag himself over, very much aware of the wounds that were covering him from making the short journey, that so often would bring him happiness.

Reaching his lover, Crowley was surprised when Aziraphale’s usually warm skin was cold to the touch. Groaning, Crowley lifted the angel and carried him out of the room. He laid the angel on the sofa, groaning.    
“What the fuck is going on” He groaned. Healing himself was an easy task, finding out what was going on with the angel? That’s a different task.    


Crowley shifted and rested his feet on the coffee table, laying Aziraphale’s head in his lap. Crowley’s hands stroked through the angel’s messy locks.    
“What am I going to do?” Crowley murmured, looking down to the pale body covering his lap.    


It took an hour for Aziraphale to go back to normal. He jolted upwards, gasping as he did.    
“I got you, I got you” Crowley promised, cupping the angel’s cheeks in his hands.    
“Crowley?” Aziraphale gasped.    
“It’s me, I’m here. I’ve got you” Crowley promised. Aziraphale panted and after a moment, he nodded.    
“What happened?” Crowley asked.    
“Gabriel…” He admitted.    
“What’s that feathered fucker want?” Crowley growled. He rolled his eyes when he saw the glare the angel was giving him.    
“He…it doesn’t matter” Aziraphale responded.   
“I’m sorry…I was only trying to do the best for you” Aziraphale muttered    
“Hey, don’t worry about it. We can fight it together, just like we did everything else” Crowley promised, taking the angel’s hand in his own.    



	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was written on mobile so if there is anything wrong, lmk

It started simple enough. 

A woman would come into the bookshop once a week, with her newborn baby. She was on maternity leave and wanted some books to read. Aziraphale led her to the copies,  _ a baby cannot touch the first editions _ he’d said to Crowley that evening when they were cuddled together. Each week, she would bring the book back in pristine condition and swap it for another one, much like a library.

It was over a year before anything changed. She walked into the bookshop one overcast Saturday morning, just as Aziraphale was debating locking up and spending the day with Crowley. The bell above the door jingled, and Aziraphale smiled as he turned on the spot.    
“Mary!” He called, smiling.    
“How are you today?” Aziraphale asked, watching as she pushed her pram into the shop.    
“I am tired as hell. Joey was up all night, I think he’s getting a fever” The woman admitted. Aziraphale nodded, making a note to perform a minor miracle.    
“I have finished this book” She smiled, pulling it from her bag. Aziraphale smiled and placed it on the counter. 

“I was wondering…both you and Anthony have been a large part of mine and Joey’s lives, especially with Ryan being away so much” The woman spoke softly. Aziraphale watched her, while thinking.  _ They both had done quite a lot for the woman, more so than maybe they should have done. The odd miracle here and there, combined with the favours that she knew about made the list almost as long as Aziraphale’s arm.  _

“We’re having him baptised when Ryan comes back from service” She continued, and Aziraphale nodded. She knew that the woman’s partner was one who worked in the armed forces, often working away for weeks, months even.    
“Would you and Anthony both like to come to the baptism?” She offered, looking over as Crowley walked in from the door that led to their bedroom. He was rubbing his eyes beneath his sunglasses, it was clear that he had just awoken.    
“That would be lovely, my dear. Count us in” Aziraphale smiled, while taking Crowley’s hand in his own.    
“Morning dear” He said, watching as Crowley walked over and kissed the top of his head.    
  
“I have to go, but I’ll drop an invite around soon” She smiled, looking over.    
“Enjoy your day” Aziraphale smiled and opened the door, watching as she left the shop.    
“Morning” Crowley smiled, leaning against the counter. He watched as Aziraphale walked over and cuddled close to the demon.    
“Good day, dear” Aziraphale smiled. Crowley smiled.    
“What is your plan for today?” Aziraphale asked, resting his head on the demon’s shoulder.   
“I was thinking we could lock up and maybe watch a movie? Or just sleep” Crowley suggested.    
“You know me so well” Aziraphale smiled. With a wave of his hand, the door was locked with a  _ clink _ and he carried out the miracle in his head.    
  
It didn’t take long for Crowley to be naked in bed, while Aziraphale was stripping slowly. It was the most human thing that they loved to do. It took a while for Aziraphale to be fully comfortable naked. After Gabriel made  _ that _ comment to Aziraphale, and as Crowley later learned, placed similar thoughts in the angel’s head, Aziraphale was incredibly insecure of his body. Sure he had a ‘gut’, but he didn’t mind. It didn’t affect him, or anyone else. He still struggled though, and it took Crowley far too long to persuade the angel that he was beautiful. 

  
“Angel, what have you signed us up to with that woman?” Crowley asked, watching as Aziraphale unbuttoned his shirt, while placing the cufflinks into their box.    
“She has asked us to go to the baptism of Joe” Aziraphale murmured, his hand sliding down to remove his shirt. He didn't miss Crowley's intake of breath when the white fabric came away, placed onto a chair. Crowley watched as Aziraphale slowly undressed, folding his clothes onto the chair. Aziraphale climbed into the bed slowly, curling close to Crowley, who rested his hand over the angel's belly. 

He tried to lift the demon’s hand away from  _ there _ , but Crowley was having none of it. Crowley gripped the angel’s belly, kissing his cheek and neck gently for a few moments.    
“You’re beautiful” Crowley murmured.    
“Wait, a baptism?!” Crowley exclaimed. Aziraphale nodded, turning to face Crowley and cuddle close.    
“That usually takes place in a church doesn’t it?” Crowley asked.    
“Yes, they do. We will think of something before the event, if you don’t want to go” Aziraphale murmured, a shiver running down his spine when the rough skin of Crowley’s chin rubbed over his shoulders and neck, a soft kiss being pressed to the skin.


	6. Chapter 6

The baptism came too quickly, and neither could think of an excuse to not go. Aziraphale was able to tempt the demon with promises of blowjobs, amongst other things. 

They were waiting outside of the church in their usual outfits, leaning against the wall. The family and friends of the child were loitering.    
“This is a bad idea, angel” Crowey muttered, pushing his sunglasses up his nose. His leg was bouncing, his hand was sweating and he was uncomfortable.    
“Don’t worry Crowley, we won’t be here long” Aziraphale promised, waving his hand slightly. Crowley smiled and kissed the top of Aziraphale’s head.    
“I love you, my angel” He whispered. Aziraphale smiled and rested his head on Crowley’s shoulder, sharing his warmth with the demon, who is forever cold. 

A black car pulls up, almost too close to Crowley’s Bentley, before Mary climbs out with Joey in her arms. Aziraphale smiles and waves to her, not moving from Crowley’s arms, which have slid beneath Aziraphale’s jacket to keep him warm. 

Inside of the church, Crowley sat as close to the door as possible, even still he was burning. Aziraphale noted this, he rested his hand high on Crowley’s thigh, hoping that it would take the demon’s mind away from the burning sensations.    
“I would like a child” Aziraphale admitted, his voice barely a whisper. Part of him hoped that Crowley did hear it, but part of Aziraphale wanted Crowley not to hear it. He saw the look that Crowley gave him through the corner of his eye, deciding not to bring it up again. 

While the ceremony was going on, Crowley couldn’t take his mind away from what he had heard Aziraphale say.  _ Sure he did want a child, but the world is a mess as it is. It doesn’t need the child of Crowley and Aziraphale too.  _ The more that he thinks about it, though, the more desirable it becomes. He can’t help but imagine Aziraphale all domestic, feeding the child and reading it bedtime stories.    
  
Then he remembered the logistics of it.  _ He’s got a male body, and while the genitals can be changed, it would cause chaos for the people that know them. They could adopt, but that may not work either. It would require an in depth background check that isn’t possible.  _

“Crowley…is everything okay?” Aziraphale asked, holding the demon’s hand in his own. He could feel the pain that the demon was going through, thankfully the ceremony was close to over. Crowley nodded, though Aziraphale suspected that he was likely lying. 

After the ceremony, everyone was invited to the local pub where there was a buffet and some time to get to know everyone. Crowley and Aziraphale agreed that they would only stay for one hour, but Crowley suspected that if they had the conversation about what Aziraphale said, he would be staying a lot longer, regardless of whether the angel stayed. 

When they walked to the Bentley, Aziraphale sighed and looked over.    
“You heard me, didn’t you?” He said softly, while climbing in.   
“I did” Crowley responded, climbing into the driver’s seat.    
“Sorry. I do not want to argue about this today. If we’re going to fight about this, we will do it at home, in private” Aziraphale said. Crowley rested his hand on Aziraphale’s leg.    
“We’re not going to fight about it” Crowley promised. Aziraphale nodded, looking down to the hand on his leg, Crowley’s rings shining in the sunlight.    
  
“If we’re going to have a child, I want to do it the right way” Crowley murmured, while following the other cars to the pub.    
“What do you mean?” Aziraphale asked. He watched as Crowley reached over, barely keeping a hand on the wheel.    
“I want you to be my husband if we’re having a child” Crowley said, while opening the glove compartment. He pulled out a small velvet box.    
“Crowley…” Aziraphale breathed, grabbing onto the handle above the door when the car swerved.    
“Sorry” Crowley muttered, gaining control of the car.    
“Crowley, are you asking me…” Aziraphale asked, eyes wide.   
“Yesss…” The demon responded. Aziraphale frowned, watching as Crowley pulled up at the side of the road outside of the pub.    
“Gimme a sec” Crowley said, before turning a snake. A moment later, he transformed back to human.    
“Sorry about that” Crowley said, snapping his clothes back to normal.    
“What in Heaven was that?” Aziraphale asked.    
“When a demon is struggling to control their emotions, they turn into their other form. For me, that’s a snake. Anyway, off topic” Crowley said, fiddling with the box in his hands. 

“I did hear what you said, I know you want a child. How would we do it though? We’re both male bodied and I don’t think people who know us would understand if one of us just changed to female” Crowley responded, still fiddling with the box.    
“That is true” Aziraphale admitted. He looked down for a moment.    
“I have an idea” Aziraphale smiled. Crowley frowned.    
“Before we go doing that, will you answer me one thing?” Crowley asked, while shifting in his seat to face the angel.    
“Of course, what is it my dear?” Aziraphale asked.    
“Will you marry me?” Crowley asked.    
“Not in the eyes of God, but for us” He spoke softly, as though God herself would hear them.    
“As if you need to ask, you should already know what the answer is” Aziraphale smiled. Crowley frowned for a moment when his insecurities peaked. He imagined the angel saying no, amongst other things. But he knew the angel would say yes, deep down he knew it. A smile covered Aziraphale’s face, a smile that reached to his eyes, and brightened the entire car.    
“Of course I will” He promised, cupping Crowley’s stubbly cheek. Leaning forward, he pressed their lips together gently. Crowley cupped Aziraphale’s hand and slid the ring onto his finger. 


	7. Chapter 7

Walking into the function room, Aziraphale found a small table in the corner. He sat down and watched as Crowley went to get them both a drink.   
“Hey Aziraphale, did you like the ceremony?” Mary came over.   
“It was wonderful, my dear” Aziraphale smiled, watching as Crowley sat back beside him. Automatically, Crowley’s hand took Aziraphale’s, a force of habit.   
“Nice to see you too, Anthony, I know you’re not a fan of churches” She said. Crowley smiled.   
“I don’t think Zira would have let me not come” Crowley smiled. Aziraphale rolled his eyes and relaxed in the seat slightly. 

Mary moved a few moments later, when her child had gotten bored. Crowley smiled and wrapped his arm around Aziraphale’s shoulders. The angel shifted closer under the demon’s arm.  
“So what was that idea of yours?” Crowley asked, after a mouthful of wine.   
“Well, I can miracle one into existence” Aziraphale smiled. Reaching down, he fiddled with the ring on his finger.   
“That simple?” Crowley asked.   
“What do you think we did for Jesus?” Aziraphale shrugged. Crowley smiled.   
“You’re perfect” He whispered, kissing the top of Aziraphale’s head.

* * *

It was a few weeks before Crowley or Aziraphale thought about children again, though by this point it was too late to back out. Crowley walked into the bookshop late in the evening. It was close to 8pm, and he knew it would be closed, but he didn’t care. He’d been in his flat all day, going insane. 

He walked through the backdoor and immediately he was overwhelmed by the smell of baby formula. He found the angel in a new room, rocking a baby in his arms. The angel didn't notice as Crowley leant against the doorframe, watching his every move with love in his eyes. The angel was bottle feeding the baby, humming something that could've been Mozart, though Crowley didn't know. 

"Would you like to meet your daddy?" Aziraphale said softly, before looking up to Crowley.  
"Meet our son" Aziraphale spoke softly as he stood up, carrying the baby to Crowley. Crowley felt tears welling in his eyes, an emotion he couldn't describe. He's not sad, far from it. _Overwhelmed._ That word seems to fit best, though even that doesn't fit well.   
"What's his name?" Crowley asked gently rubbing his thumb over the back of the baby's head. Aziraphale bit his lip.  
"I was thinking we would decide together" Aziraphale said softly, looking down to the baby who was almost falling asleep.  
  
"Hey, Zira, you know when he's older…he's gonna ask about stuff like if he was adopted, about my eyes, about us…" Crowley said softly, while lifting the sleeping baby into his arm. Aziraphale's eyes filled with love at the sight, he wanted to take a photo that he could cherish forever.  
"Maybe he will. We'll make it up as we go along, like we have so many times before" Aziraphale said softly. Crowley nodded.  
"Okay" He breathed.  
"Okay?" Aziraphale asked.  
"Yeah, we're okay. He, whatever we name him, is ours" Crowley smiled, moving to lay the sleeping baby down in the crib. Aziraphale smiled and hugged Crowley tightly, a wide smile on both of their faces. 

"He's absolutely gorgeous" Crowley whispered, his arms winding around the angel's waist.  
"Much like a human child is a mix of the parents… _he_ is a mixture of us" Aziraphale smiled, his arms circling Crowley's arms.

They watched the child sleep for a while longer before slowly making their way out of the room. 

Walking into their bedroom, Crowley grabbed the angel and hugged him impossibly tightly.  
"I bloody love you" He said softly. Aziraphale smiled softly, holding onto the demon.  
"and I love you" He whispered. Crowley smiled softly.  
"What made you come around?" Aziraphale asked.  
"Bored. I've been in my flat all day, staring at the ceiling and scaring the plants" Crowley chuckled. Aziraphale rolled his eyes.  
"You should have come over earlier" He smiled. Crowley smiled.  
"I'm here now, to stay" He promised. Aziraphale smiled and kissed the demon's cheek. With only a thought, the fire in the corner was roaring and there was a bottle of red on the table beside the bed.  
"You're perfect" Crowley murmured, kissing the angel gently. Before Aziraphale could respond with _I'm not perfect_ , Crowley quickly added a response.   
"Perfect to me" 

"Anthony Jay or Jay Anthony" Aziraphale murmured, looking at the now empty wine glass.   
"Hm?" Crowley asked, hearing the name he hadn't used for over 75 years.  
"For him, I like those" Aziraphale smiled.  
"Jay Anthony fits…" Crowley smiled. Aziraphale smiled and curled close to Crowley, eventually falling asleep in the demon’s arms. 


End file.
